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summer_of_giles2022-07-17 12:22 pm
aaronlisa) wrote in summer_of_giles2022-07-17 12:22 pm
FIC: Leaving, FR13/PG13
Title: Leaving
Author:aaronlisa
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Pairing: mentions of past and/or implied Giles/Ethan, Giles/Joyce, Giles/Jenny and Giles/Olivia
Characters: Rupert Giles
Rating: FR13
Disclaimer: BtVS belongs to Whedon and company.
Notes: This is more of a character study looking at Giles through how he feels about his failed relationships then it is about his actual relationships. This was written for the 2022 Summer of Giles.
Summary: He decides to leave Sunnydale for a second time largely for himself.
Word Count: 736
Rupert Giles wants nothing more than to stay in Sunnydale. It's become his home more than England ever was. Buffy and her friends have become his family. But he knows that he can't stay. To do so would be a disservice to Buffy and even to the others. And most importantly to himself.
He's almost fifty years old and he's only three serious relationships. Four, if he counts that sort of quasi-relationship with Joyce Summers that never really got beyond a very short fling when the pair of them were bespelled into teenagers by tainted chocolate followed by months of awkwardness. In the end, they had decided over a few glasses of wine at one of the showings at Joyce's gallery that they were better off apart.
His relationship with Ethan had always been doomed for several reasons. Even if Ethan hadn't been drawn to the dark arts and chaos, there was the fact that Rupert was straight and Ethan was not. And although it had been enough at the start that they had loved one another for the person they were and not the gender they possessed, eventually it had become a problem. They both wanted certain things from one another that neither could provide.
And then there was Jenny and Olivia.
Thinking of Jenny still caused him far too much pain. He had moved past his grief over her death in relation to any lost love between them and what could have been for them had they had the chance for him to realize what an immeasurable ass he had been for letting a teenager tell him as an adult what to do. He had long accepted the fact that Jenny had been in the right to hide who she was and her connection to Angel. Truth be told, there were many times that he had lied to Buffy and the other children, not to harm them but to protect them or because they simply did not need to know. An omission of truth made more sense than saying the truth.
The pain he still felt over Jenny was over the fact that her life had been cut short because Angelus had known it would cause him pain. It was not about Jenny's connections to the Kalderash clan or her desire to curse him again. Jenny had been murdered largely because Angelus had known it would devastate Rupert and it would affect Buffy. Jenny's murder had caused him to reject the idea of having a relationship. He had refused to put another woman at risk, even if she knew the risks that being associated with him would bring to her.
Maybe that had made him a sexist prig. Rupert preferred to think of himself being stuck in a holding pattern. One of their own had been murdered. Even without Angelus desperate for revenge, any one of them could be at risk.
And then Olivia had come back into his life. And he had been hopeful of a future. And it had gone nowhere,. Perhaps someone else would blame Buffy for the failure of his relationship. He had stayed in Sunnydale because he was still Buffy's Watcher, even if the Council did not recognize it as such. However, that assessment was far from the truth Olivia had thought she could handle the things that Rupert dealt with on a daily basis. But the Gentleman had terrified her. It had been nothing like she had ever seen before.
In the end, Olivia had wanted Rupert to return home and to step into a romantic view of him from the past where he had worked as an antique bookseller. Something that Rupert had never been. Even if he had left Sunnydale for her there had been no way that Rupert would have given up being an active force working against the powers of darkness.
Staying in Sunnydale would have resulted in him giving up any hope of a future romantic relationship. And while he might still be unlucky in love if he left and returned to the Council and England, Rupert could at least argue that he had least given himself a chance to find love. It would also give him a chance at finding out who he was outside of being the opposite of Ethan determined to atone for his real and imagined sins. And for finding out who he was outside of being Buffy's Watcher.
((END))
Author:
aaronlisa Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Pairing: mentions of past and/or implied Giles/Ethan, Giles/Joyce, Giles/Jenny and Giles/Olivia
Characters: Rupert Giles
Rating: FR13
Disclaimer: BtVS belongs to Whedon and company.
Notes: This is more of a character study looking at Giles through how he feels about his failed relationships then it is about his actual relationships. This was written for the 2022 Summer of Giles.
Summary: He decides to leave Sunnydale for a second time largely for himself.
Word Count: 736
Rupert Giles wants nothing more than to stay in Sunnydale. It's become his home more than England ever was. Buffy and her friends have become his family. But he knows that he can't stay. To do so would be a disservice to Buffy and even to the others. And most importantly to himself.
He's almost fifty years old and he's only three serious relationships. Four, if he counts that sort of quasi-relationship with Joyce Summers that never really got beyond a very short fling when the pair of them were bespelled into teenagers by tainted chocolate followed by months of awkwardness. In the end, they had decided over a few glasses of wine at one of the showings at Joyce's gallery that they were better off apart.
His relationship with Ethan had always been doomed for several reasons. Even if Ethan hadn't been drawn to the dark arts and chaos, there was the fact that Rupert was straight and Ethan was not. And although it had been enough at the start that they had loved one another for the person they were and not the gender they possessed, eventually it had become a problem. They both wanted certain things from one another that neither could provide.
And then there was Jenny and Olivia.
Thinking of Jenny still caused him far too much pain. He had moved past his grief over her death in relation to any lost love between them and what could have been for them had they had the chance for him to realize what an immeasurable ass he had been for letting a teenager tell him as an adult what to do. He had long accepted the fact that Jenny had been in the right to hide who she was and her connection to Angel. Truth be told, there were many times that he had lied to Buffy and the other children, not to harm them but to protect them or because they simply did not need to know. An omission of truth made more sense than saying the truth.
The pain he still felt over Jenny was over the fact that her life had been cut short because Angelus had known it would cause him pain. It was not about Jenny's connections to the Kalderash clan or her desire to curse him again. Jenny had been murdered largely because Angelus had known it would devastate Rupert and it would affect Buffy. Jenny's murder had caused him to reject the idea of having a relationship. He had refused to put another woman at risk, even if she knew the risks that being associated with him would bring to her.
Maybe that had made him a sexist prig. Rupert preferred to think of himself being stuck in a holding pattern. One of their own had been murdered. Even without Angelus desperate for revenge, any one of them could be at risk.
And then Olivia had come back into his life. And he had been hopeful of a future. And it had gone nowhere,. Perhaps someone else would blame Buffy for the failure of his relationship. He had stayed in Sunnydale because he was still Buffy's Watcher, even if the Council did not recognize it as such. However, that assessment was far from the truth Olivia had thought she could handle the things that Rupert dealt with on a daily basis. But the Gentleman had terrified her. It had been nothing like she had ever seen before.
In the end, Olivia had wanted Rupert to return home and to step into a romantic view of him from the past where he had worked as an antique bookseller. Something that Rupert had never been. Even if he had left Sunnydale for her there had been no way that Rupert would have given up being an active force working against the powers of darkness.
Staying in Sunnydale would have resulted in him giving up any hope of a future romantic relationship. And while he might still be unlucky in love if he left and returned to the Council and England, Rupert could at least argue that he had least given himself a chance to find love. It would also give him a chance at finding out who he was outside of being the opposite of Ethan determined to atone for his real and imagined sins. And for finding out who he was outside of being Buffy's Watcher.
((END))