aaronlisa: (BtVS: Giles (time?))
aaronlisa ([personal profile] aaronlisa) wrote in [community profile] summer_of_giles2017-07-10 05:54 pm

FIC: Five Kisses, FR13

Title: Five Kisses
Author: [personal profile] aaronlisa
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Characters: Rupert Giles
Pairings: Rupert/Ethan, Rupert/Joyce, Rupert/Olivia, Rupert/Drusilla, Rupert/Jenny
Rating: FR13
Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer belongs to Joss Whedon & company.
Notes: Written for the 2017 [community profile] summer_of_giles. This doesn't really go beyond Season Four of BtVS.
Summary: A look at four of the romantic relationships that Giles has had over the years.
Word Count: 1183



1.

Ethan's kisses are rough. It's always a fight of lips, tongues and teeth.

Ethan's kisses are always about dominance.

He always complains about Ethan's kisses afterwards, when his lips are swollen and bruised. Ethan always roles his eyes at him before he lights up a cigarette.

It all comes to a head finally. It's late and they've been messing around with magic and drugs and drink. And after an intense session of kissing, Rupert's lips hurt. He complains about it as the pair of them lay in the semi-dark room. It's not quite dawn but it's close enough.

"If you want gentle then go kiss Deirdre," Ethan snarls as he pulls on his jeans.

Rupert lays there in the dark. Watching it as it turns from black to a dark grey and eventually into a pearly grey. He doesn't really want gentle at all. What he wants is Ethan. Even if knows that his father and grandmother would disapprove. Even if he knows that whatever he has with Ethan won't last. It can't.

But he wants whatever it is while it lasts. He doesn't bother throwing on clothes as he makes his through the flat to find Ethan on the couch, smoking a cigarette. Neither of them need words as they kiss and fight for dominance and instead achieve an temporary alliance built on need and lust.

2.

He had enjoyed kissing Joyce in the moment, when he was under the spell of tainted chocolate. It made him feel alive. It made him forget about all of the heartache and the lonely nights. For a moment or two after the fact, he had entertained the idea about seeing what it felt like to kiss Joyce when they weren't under the spell of tainted chocolate.

There's a part of him that sounds an awful lot like Ethan that tells him to go for it. What's there to lose? Joyce knows about Buffy, she knows about his role in her daughter's life. When it comes to major decisions about Buffy, she often consults him to make sure that she understands what a Slayer means and how it affects Buffy in pretty much every aspect of her life.

Rupert knows that with Joyce, things will be easy. (Not always but it's never easy in any relationship.) He knows that there's a spark that exists between them. (It's something that goes far beyond their connection through Buffy and far beyond what enchanted chocolate could make them feel.)

Yet instead of calling her to ask how she's doing and to invite her out to some event that they'd both enjoy, he puts the phone receiver back in the cradle. He can't help but think about how much a target she already has on her back because of her daughter. He has enough enemies to do that to her.

Kissing her had been sweet and divine. Her kisses are almost enough to throw caution to the wind but he can't do that to her. He can't make her more of a target than she already is. Losing Jenny had almost killed him. Loving and losing Joyce would push him over the edge.


3.

Drusilla's kisses are sharp.

He knows deep in his soul that the woman kissing him isn't Jenny. He might be under her spell but he knows the moment when her lips met his. Yet he gives into the illusion and lets himself feel something that he will never have again.

The sharpness of her fangs remind him that no matter what his eyes tell him, she's not Jenny. It reminds him of how he failed Jenny, how he's failed Buffy and pretty much every other person he's ever loved.

The illusion is anything but sweet. Still he kisses her back over and over again. Her sharp fangs stinging each time she kisses him.


4.

Olivia was the first girl he had ever kissed. Properly.

Before Olivia there had been experimentation with girls and the occasional boy but his family had sent him to an elite school that specialized in turning out Watchers. There was no time at school to train and study and indulge in kissing.

What he had with Olivia didn't last long. As much as he enjoyed spending time with her and could even see them as something more, Ethan came on the scene and Rupert was distracted by Ethan. He gave into his rage and angst and hatred of the life his family just expected him to follow because of tradition.

When she came to him in Sunnydale and things picked up as if twenty some odd years hadn't gone by, he had thought he was going to be able to have a future with her. One that he had been denied over and over again.

If kissing Olivia when they had been a pair of teens had been pleasant, kissing her as an adult had been delicious. Things were looking upwards for the first time in a very long time.

And then Sunnydale had wreaked havoc in his love life. She had left him. (And he couldn't really fault her.)


5.

Sometimes he hates how Jenny sees him as a stuffy, antiquated old man who can't let loose. Just because he's not into computers or monster truck rallies or American sports, doesn't mean that he a stuffy old Watcher who knows more about tweed and tea than he does about living. (He is not his father or any of the other old men on the Council who don't know anything about the young girls they want to be disposable warriors.)

Yet he can't really tell her who he is - he can't tell her that he's reserved, uptight and so very controlled because of what happens when he's not. Of how reckless he used to be, of how careless and ruthless he used to be.

She knows about Eyghon but there's more dark secrets in his closet beside that one. Ones that he doesn't want anyone to know about. There's a darkness in him, a stain upon on his soul and he's afraid that if he tells her, she'll turn away from him.

So he lets her believe that she wants. Maybe he'll come to believe the lie that has everyone else convinced. What makes up for it, is the lazy Sundays spent in his apartment where he sits on the couch reading (something that has nothing to do with the supernatural) and she lays in on the couch, her head on his leg as she reads something else.

He knows she has her own lies. It's easy enough to spot them in others when you've been telling them for so long yourself. He doesn't ever press her to tell the truth to him or try to uncover what she keeps hidden. She doesn't press him so he returns the favour. Instead he relishes her kisses and how he can believe that it'll be easy for them to make a life together even if it's built on lies about who they really are.

He loves her and that's all that matters.

((END))


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